For someone guilty of touching the thermostat

Thermostat Interference Order

For the household operative conducting unauthorized temperature policy. Choose 3 charges from 9, or write your own.

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The notice and the serving script, delivered instantly. Print it, or send the link.
Climate Control Authority
Notice of Warning
In the matter of Unauthorized Climate Adjustment
File THE-6491Issued SEPTEMBER 18, 2026Served under youvebeenserved.shop
OffenseTouching the thermostatSeverityStep 1 of 3 · Notice of Warning
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household

You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:

Provisions breached
  1. § 4.6a
    Unauthorized adjustment. Altering an agreed setting without consultation, notice, or any subsequent admission.
  2. § 4.6b
    Overcorrection. Responding to a two-degree grievance with a nine-degree intervention.
  3. § 4.6c
    Denial of interference. Asserting that the device “must have reset itself”, a thing it has never once done.

It is therefore ordered that the Respondent cease all adjustment and put on a sweater like everybody else, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated.

Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.

Response required

The Respondent is required to answer. Detach the stub below and scan the code. Your answer is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

Signed, the complainant
Sarah
Witness to service
print name
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate. Not an energy audit, but the bill is itemized.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file THE-6491
Marcus
Scan to answer

You are required to respond. Choose one:

No camera? Go to youvebeenserved.shop

VOID00
Also included · the serving script

The words to say while you hand it over.

“Serve it in the room in question, at whatever temperature they have chosen.”

  • The script to read while serving them, in order
  • Stage directions, where to stand, when to pause
  • Best performed to an audience. Film it.

They are probably guilty of something else too

§ 12.1Never replacing the toilet rollReplenishment Order§ 12.4Occupying the bathroom for hoursBathroom Occupancy Order§ 7.6Loading the dishwasher wrongLoading Standards Notice§ 12.9Leaving the seat upToilet Seat Position Order

Also called heating · cold · hot · temperature · bills