For someone guilty of loading the dishwasher wrong

Loading Standards Notice

For the one whose loading technique has been described, accurately, as an attack. Choose 3 charges from 9, or write your own.

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The notice and the serving script, delivered instantly. Print it, or send the link.
Bureau of Kitchen Standards
Notice of Warning
In the matter of Non-Conforming Placement of Items
File DIS-8146Issued SEPTEMBER 18, 2026Served under youvebeenserved.shop
OffenseLoading the dishwasher wrongSeverityStep 1 of 3 · Notice of Warning
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household

You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:

Provisions breached
  1. § 7.6a
    Non-conforming placement. Arranging items in a manner preventing their being cleaned.
  2. § 7.6b
    The face-up bowl. Positioning a vessel to collect water rather than release it.
  3. § 7.6c
    Capacity waste. Achieving a full cycle with a load that could have been half of one.

It is therefore ordered that the Respondent load it the way it was agreed, or accept the loading of others without comment, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated.

Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.

Response required

The Respondent is required to answer. Detach the stub below and scan the code. Your answer is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

Signed, the complainant
Sarah
Witness to service
print name
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file DIS-8146
Marcus
Scan to answer

You are required to respond. Choose one:

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VOID00
Also included · the serving script

The words to say while you hand it over.

“Serve it with the door open and the evidence visible.”

  • The script to read while serving them, in order
  • Stage directions, where to stand, when to pause
  • Best performed to an audience. Film it.

They are probably guilty of something else too

§ 12.1Never replacing the toilet rollReplenishment Order§ 16.5Watching a whole season in one sittingContinuous Viewing Order§ 23.3An alarm that wakes everyone but themAlarm Discipline Order§ 2.6Farting in front of everyoneAmbient Emission Notice

Also called dishwasher · kitchen · chores · dishes