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  • Three charges you choose, from nine written for that habit
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Office of Workplace Conduct
Notice of Warning
In the matter of Reheating of Odorous Food in a Shared Space
File DES-2341Issued SEPTEMBER 18, 2026Served under youvebeenserved.shop
OffenseReheating fish at the deskSeverityStep 1 of 3 · Notice of Warning
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household

You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:

Provisions breached
  1. § 26.4a
    Emission in a shared space. Release of an odor into an office from which no party may escape before five.
  2. § 26.4b
    Persistence beyond the meal. Maintenance of a detectable presence for four hours after consumption had ended.
  3. § 26.4c
    Use of shared equipment. Operation of a communal appliance in a manner requiring its immediate retirement.

It is therefore ordered that the Respondent eat it outside, as everyone agreed, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated.

Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.

Response required

The Respondent is required to answer. Detach the stub below and scan the code. Your answer is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

Signed, the complainant
Sarah
Witness to service
print name
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file DES-2341
Marcus
Scan to answer

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Workplace Odor Notice · one of 55 for this
Best for this

Pick what they are guilty of.

§ 26.4Reheating fish at the deskIssues: Workplace Odor NoticeFor the colleague whose lunch is still in the air at four o’clock.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 26.7Taking food from the office fridgeIssues: Communal Refrigerator OrderFor the one who ate a labeled sandwich and said nothing.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 21.7Replying allIssues: Reply-All Restraining OrderFor the colleague who thanked forty people individually, all at once.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 26.1Booking meetings that could be emailsIssues: Unnecessary Meeting NoticeFor the one who gathers nine people to read a document aloud.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 31.4Overrunning every meetingIssues: Meeting Overrun OrderFor the one who says “just one more thing” at the fifty-ninth minute.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 31.2Being late to everythingIssues: Chronic Lateness WarningFor the friend whose “leaving now” has never once meant leaving now.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 21.2Leaving messages on readIssues: Read Receipt CitationFor the one who reads it, thinks about it, and never replies.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 18.1Chewing with your mouth openIssues: Mastication Conduct OrderFor the one whose eating you can hear from the next room. One of the most complained-of habits there is.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 37.2On their phone all the timeIssues: Undivided Attention OrderFor the one who is in the room and somewhere else at the same time.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 2.7Not washing their handsIssues: Hand Hygiene OrderFor the colleague you once followed out of the bathroom, and have thought about ever since.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 22.4Tagging you in everythingIssues: Tagging Restraint OrderFor the one who tags you in nine posts a day, none of them relevant.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 10.2Splitting the bill evenlyIssues: Equitable Division OrderFor the one who orders the lobster and then suggests splitting it down the middle.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 24.2Speakerphone in an open officeIssues: Ambient Noise CitationFor the one whose every call is a performance for forty people.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 7.3Taking the last of it and saying nothingIssues: Provision Replacement OrderFor the one who takes the last coffee and puts the empty tin back.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 10.4Always forgetting their walletIssues: Means of Payment OrderFor the one whose wallet is always in the other coat.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 10.5Always getting you next timeIssues: Reciprocity Enforcement NoticeFor the friend for whom next time has never once arrived.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 2.4Cracking knuckles constantlyIssues: Percussive Habit NoticeFor the one who cracks every joint they own, in sequence, all day.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 26.8Sending nine messages instead of oneIssues: Channel Discipline NoticeFor the colleague whose single thought arrives as eleven notifications.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 10.3Requesting three dollars backIssues: Micro-Request Cease and DesistFor the friend who sends a payment request for a coffee. With an emoji.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 15.5FaceTiming on speaker in publicIssues: Public Video Call OrderFor the one conducting a full video call, on speaker, on a train.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 21.1One-word repliesIssues: Minimum Reply OrderFor the one whose answer to a paragraph is “K”.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 2.10Sniffing instead of using a tissueIssues: Tissue Deployment NoticeFor the one who has sniffed every forty seconds since November.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 12.3Taking calls from the toiletIssues: Call Location OrderFor the one whose colleagues have all heard a flush mid-sentence.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 21.4Replying to messages from days agoIssues: Delayed Thread NoticeFor the one who answers a question from Tuesday, on Saturday, with no context.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 2.5Picking their nose in companyIssues: Nasal Conduct OrderFor the one who thinks nobody can see them at a red light. Everybody can see them.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 5.3Borrowing and not returningIssues: Unreturned Property DemandFor the one who has your charger, your book, and no memory of either.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 7.1Leaving the microwave explodedIssues: Communal Appliance OrderFor the one who reheats a curry with no lid and walks away.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 7.5Never throwing anything out of the fridgeIssues: Perishables Removal OrderFor the household whose fridge contains something nobody will open.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 10.1Never paying back small amountsIssues: Outstanding Balance NoticeFor the friend who owes you eleven dollars from March and does not know it.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 32.1Never remembering birthdaysIssues: Anniversary Recollection NoticeFor the one who has never once remembered without being told, twice.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 35.1Always ordering one more roundIssues: Closing Time OrderFor the friend who orders another round while everyone else is putting their coat on.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 14.4Asking then not listeningIssues: Attention Deficit CitationFor the one who asks how you are and is gone before the second word.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 14.2One-upping every storyIssues: Anecdotal Escalation WarningFor the friend whose weekend was always slightly better than yours.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 22.1Posting unflattering photos of youIssues: Image Publication OrderFor the friend who always picks the photo where they look good and you do not.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 35.3Texting everyone at 2amIssues: Nocturnal Correspondence InjunctionFor the friend whose most heartfelt messages all arrive between one and three in the morning.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 21.6Texting “call me” and never answeringIssues: Contact Method OrderFor the one who sends “call me” and then does not pick up, for two days.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 38.5Passive-aggressive notesIssues: Direct Communication OrderFor the roommate who leaves notes on the fridge instead of saying anything.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 36.5Asking what everything costIssues: Financial Disclosure OrderFor the relative who asks what you earn, what you paid, and what it is worth now.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 14.1Interrupting constantlyIssues: Interruption Cease and DesistFor the one who has never once heard the end of a sentence.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 13.5Never muting on callsIssues: Microphone Discipline OrderFor the colleague whose every call includes their kitchen, their dog and their breathing.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 26.3Per my last emailIssues: Correspondence Tone NoticeFor the colleague whose politeness is a weapon and everybody knows it.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 26.6Meetings at 4:55 on a FridayIssues: Scheduling Conduct OrderFor the colleague who books half an hour at the exact moment the week ends.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 26.2Camera off in every meetingIssues: Visual Presence OrderFor the colleague who has been a gray circle with initials since 2021.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 13.4Typing with the clicks onIssues: Keyboard Acoustics NoticeFor the one whose phone clicks for every single letter, in a silent room.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 13.2Watching videos without headphonesIssues: Headphone Enforcement OrderFor the one who watches nine-second videos on speaker, on a train, at volume.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 28.1Never re-racking the weightsIssues: Weight Restoration OrderFor the one who leaves every plate on the bar for the next person to deal with.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 28.3Not wiping down the equipmentIssues: Equipment Sanitation OrderFor the one who leaves the bench exactly as wet as they found it dry.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 28.2Sitting on a machine scrollingIssues: Station Occupation NoticeFor the one who has been sitting on the leg press for eleven minutes, on their phone.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 33.1Talking about their dietIssues: Dietary Evangelism WarningFor the one who has told you what they no longer eat, at every meal, since January.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 18.2Ordering for the whole tableIssues: Ordering Authority OrderFor the one who orders for everybody and asks nobody.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 15.1Jumping the lineIssues: Line Integrity OrderFor the one who joins a line somewhere other than the end of it.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 14.3Explaining what you just saidIssues: Redundant Explanation OrderFor the one who repeats your own point back to you, slowly, as a favor.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 26.5Taking credit for your workIssues: Attribution OrderFor the colleague who presents your work and says “we” exactly once.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 2.12Coughing without coveringIssues: Containment NoticeFor the one who coughs into the open air of a room containing other people.Choose 3Serve ▸§ 2.1Clipping nails in shared roomsIssues: Grooming Location OrderFor the one who does that on the sofa. In front of people. With a sound.Choose 3Serve ▸
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