For someone guilty of always ordering one more round

Closing Time Order

For the friend who orders another round while everyone else is putting their coat on. Choose 3 charges from 9, or write your own.

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The notice and the serving script, delivered instantly. Print it, or send the link.
Office of Revelry
Notice of Warning
In the matter of Extension of an Evening Beyond Consensus
File ONE-3716Issued SEPTEMBER 18, 2026Served under youvebeenserved.shop
OffenseAlways ordering one more roundSeverityStep 1 of 3 · Notice of Warning
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household

You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:

Provisions breached
  1. § 35.1a
    Extension beyond consensus. Prolonging an evening the group has agreed to conclude.
  2. § 35.1b
    The pre-emptive round. Ordering while others are visibly gathering their belongings.
  3. § 35.1c
    Coat obstruction. Physically intercepting a departure already under way.

It is therefore ordered that the Respondent let the evening end when the group has decided it has ended, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated.

Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.

Response required

The Respondent is required to answer. Detach the stub below and scan the code. Your answer is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

Signed, the complainant
Sarah
Witness to service
print name
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate. Not a health warning, but it is a Tuesday.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file ONE-3716
Marcus
Scan to answer

You are required to respond. Choose one:

No camera? Go to youvebeenserved.shop

VOID00
Also included · the serving script

The words to say while you hand it over.

“Serve it as the coats go on, before they reach the bar.”

  • The script to read while serving them, in order
  • Stage directions, where to stand, when to pause
  • Best performed to an audience. Film it.

They are probably guilty of something else too

§ 31.2Being late to everythingChronic Lateness Warning§ 21.2Leaving messages on readRead Receipt Citation§ 18.1Chewing with your mouth openMastication Conduct Order§ 37.2On their phone all the timeUndivided Attention Order

Also called drinking · drink · alcohol · booze · pub · bar · boozy