For someone guilty of per my last email

Correspondence Tone Notice

For the colleague whose politeness is a weapon and everybody knows it. Choose 3 charges from 9, or write your own.

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The notice and the serving script, delivered instantly. Print it, or send the link.
Bureau of Workplace Conduct
Notice of Warning
In the matter of Deployment of Passive Correspondence
File PER-1725Issued SEPTEMBER 18, 2026Served under youvebeenserved.shop
OffensePer my last emailSeverityStep 1 of 3 · Notice of Warning
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household

You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:

Provisions breached
  1. § 26.3a
    Deployment of passive correspondence. Using a formula whose politeness conveys the opposite.
  2. § 26.3b
    Escalation by copy. Adding a manager to a thread that had not required one.
  3. § 26.3c
    The quoted history. Attaching the entire preceding chain to demonstrate a point already made.

It is therefore ordered that the Respondent say the thing directly, or pick up the telephone, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated.

Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.

Response required

The Respondent is required to answer. Detach the stub below and scan the code. Your answer is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

Signed, the complainant
Sarah
Witness to service
print name
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file PER-1725
Marcus
Scan to answer

You are required to respond. Choose one:

No camera? Go to youvebeenserved.shop

VOID00
Also included · the serving script

The words to say while you hand it over.

“Serve it by reply. Copy in the same people they did.”

  • The script to read while serving them, in order
  • Stage directions, where to stand, when to pause
  • Best performed to an audience. Film it.

They are probably guilty of something else too

§ 31.2Being late to everythingChronic Lateness Warning§ 26.1Booking meetings that could be emailsUnnecessary Meeting Notice§ 26.7Taking food from the office fridgeCommunal Refrigerator Order§ 21.2Leaving messages on readRead Receipt Citation

Also called email · passive · aggressive · office