Final Notice
In the matter of Habitual Arrival Without Means
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household
You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:
- § 10.4aHabitual arrival without means. Attending a paid occasion without any method of paying.
- § 10.4bThe other coat. Attributing the absence to a garment at home, on each occasion.
- § 10.4cDeclined card theatre. Producing a card known in advance to be non-functional.
- § 10.4dDelayed discovery. Establishing the absence only after the food has been eaten.
- § 10.4eThe unresolved undertaking. Promising to settle later and not returning to the subject.
It is therefore ordered that the Respondent carry a means of payment and use it first, effective immediately. This is a final notice. No further warnings will be issued. Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate. Not medical advice — but do get up.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file WAL-7661
Marcus
Scan to respond. You may plead guilty, appeal, or refuse to acknowledge this notice. Your response is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.
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