For someone guilty of never letting anybody else pick the music

Selection Rights Order

For the one who has controlled every playlist since you met them. Choose 3 charges from 9, or write your own.

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The notice and the serving script, delivered instantly. Print it, or send the link.
Office of Audio Standards
Notice of Warning
In the matter of Monopoly of Audio Selection
File AUX-3944Issued SEPTEMBER 18, 2026Served under youvebeenserved.shop
OffenseNever letting anybody else pick the musicSeverityStep 1 of 3 · Notice of Warning
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household

You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:

Provisions breached
  1. § 24.4a
    Monopoly of selection. Retaining control of shared audio across every occasion.
  2. § 24.4b
    The premature skip. Terminating another’s choice within forty seconds of it beginning.
  3. § 24.4c
    Commentary. Supplying context nobody requested for each track as it starts.

It is therefore ordered that the Respondent surrender the selection for a full hour without commentary, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated.

Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.

Response required

The Respondent is required to answer. Detach the stub below and scan the code. Your answer is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

Signed, the complainant
Sarah
Witness to service
print name
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file AUX-3944
Marcus
Scan to answer

You are required to respond. Choose one:

No camera? Go to youvebeenserved.shop

VOID00
Also included · the serving script

The words to say while you hand it over.

“Serve it in the car, at the moment they skip somebody else’s song.”

  • The script to read while serving them, in order
  • Stage directions, where to stand, when to pause
  • Best performed to an audience. Film it.

They are probably guilty of something else too

§ 2.6Farting in front of everyoneAmbient Emission Notice§ 27.2Texting while drivingHandheld Device Injunction§ 22.2Checking in everywhereLocation Broadcast Notice§ 11.1Reclining the seat fullySeat Recline Injunction

Also called music · playlist · aux · car · spotify