Notice of Warning
In the matter of Departure from an Agreed List
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household
You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:
- § 19.3aDeparture from the list. Returning with items bearing no relation to those requested.
- § 19.3bThe primary omission. Failing to obtain the single item that prompted the journey.
- § 19.3cHunger-led selection. Attending the shop in a state known to affect the outcome.
- § 19.3dOffer susceptibility. Acquiring three of something on the basis of a promotional sign.
- § 19.3eDuplicate purchase. Buying an item already present, in quantity, at home.
It is therefore ordered that the Respondent buy what is on the list, and only what is on the list, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated. Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate. Not medical advice — but do get up.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file BAS-1466
Marcus
Scan to respond. You may plead guilty, appeal, or refuse to acknowledge this notice. Your response is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.
https://www.youvebeenserved.shop
VOID00