For someone guilty of buying the loudest possible toy

Acoustic Gift Injunction

For the grandparent who buys the drum kit, and then goes home. Choose 3 charges from 9, or write your own.

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The notice and the serving script, delivered instantly. Print it, or send the link.
Office of Extended Family Relations
Notice of Warning
In the matter of Introduction of an Acoustic Device to Another Household
File LOU-6382Issued SEPTEMBER 18, 2026Served under youvebeenserved.shop
OffenseBuying the loudest possible toySeverityStep 1 of 3 · Notice of Warning
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household

You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:

Provisions breached
  1. § 36.10a
    Introduction of an acoustic device. Placing a noise-producing item into a household that did not choose it.
  2. § 36.10b
    Volume selection. Choosing, from several available, the model without a volume control.
  3. § 36.10c
    Battery inclusion. Supplying power so that the item may begin functioning immediately.

It is therefore ordered that the Respondent clear every noise-producing gift with a parent before buying it, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated.

Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.

Response required

The Respondent is required to answer. Detach the stub below and scan the code. Your answer is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

Signed, the complainant
Sarah
Witness to service
print name
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file LOU-6382
Marcus
Scan to answer

You are required to respond. Choose one:

No camera? Go to youvebeenserved.shop

VOID00
Also included · the serving script

The words to say while you hand it over.

“Serve it at the moment of unwrapping, while it is still going off.”

  • The script to read while serving them, in order
  • Stage directions, where to stand, when to pause
  • Best performed to an audience. Film it.

They are probably guilty of something else too

§ 36.3Undermining the rules with the grandchildrenRule Undermining Injunction§ 36.7The weekend visit that becomes a two weeksVisit Duration Order§ 36.2Unsolicited parenting adviceUnsolicited Guidance Order§ 36.8Rearranging your kitchen while “helping”Unauthorized Reorganization Notice

Also called inlaws · in · laws · grandparents · presents · noisy · toys