Screen Luminance Order

For the one whose screen lights the whole bedroom like a small sun. Choose 5 charges from 9, or write your own.

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Screen Luminance Order · two documents · 5 charges you choose + the serving script
Office of Devices and Connectivity
Notice of Warning
In the matter of Emission of Light at an Unreasonable Level
File BRI-6773Issued AUGUST 23, 2026Served under youvebeenserved.shop
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household

You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:

  1. § 13.3a
    Emission at an unreasonable level. Operating a screen at full output in a room otherwise dark.
  2. § 13.3b
    Ceiling illumination. Producing sufficient light to render the ceiling visible from across the room.
  3. § 13.3c
    The unadjusted setting. Declining to use a night mode present on the device and enabled by default.
  4. § 13.3d
    Angle disregard. Orienting the screen toward the face of a sleeping party.
  5. § 13.3e
    Duration. Sustaining the practice well past the hour at which sleep was announced.

It is therefore ordered that the Respondent reduce brightness to the lowest setting after the lights are off, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated. Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.

Response required

The Respondent is required to answer this notice. Detach the stub below and scan it; you may plead guilty, plead not guilty and appeal, or refuse to acknowledge the notice. Your answer is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

OffenseFull brightness in a dark roomSeverityStep 1 of 3 · Notice of Warning
Signed, the complainant
Sarah
Witness to service
print name
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate. Not medical advice — but do get up.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file BRI-6773
Marcus

Scan to respond. You may plead guilty, appeal, or refuse to acknowledge this notice. Your response is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

https://www.youvebeenserved.shop
VOID00
Also included · the serving script

The words to say while you hand it over.

“Serve it in the dark. They will have plenty of light to read it by.”

  • The exact lines to read aloud, in order
  • Stage directions — where to stand, when to pause
  • Best performed to an audience. Film it.

They are probably guilty of something else too

§ 12.1Never replacing the toilet rollReplenishment Order§ 24.3TV at a volume nobody needsBroadcast Volume Order§ 18.1Chewing with your mouth openMastication Conduct Order§ 4.2Every light in the house onIllumination Discipline Notice