For someone guilty of never changing the bulb

Illumination Restoration Notice

For the household that has lived by the light of one working bulb since spring. Choose 3 charges from 9, or write your own.

Back to the catalog
The notice and the serving script, delivered instantly. Print it, or send the link.
Bureau of Domestic Maintenance
Notice of Warning
In the matter of Persistence of a Failed Light Source
File LIG-8299Issued SEPTEMBER 18, 2026Served under youvebeenserved.shop
OffenseNever changing the bulbSeverityStep 1 of 3 · Notice of Warning
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household

You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:

Provisions breached
  1. § 25.3a
    Persistence of failure. Permitting a failed source to remain in place for months.
  2. § 25.3b
    Adaptive behavior. Adjusting your habits around the darkness rather than addressing it.
  3. § 25.3c
    The unbought bulb. Passing the correct item in a shop, weekly, without acquiring it.

It is therefore ordered that the Respondent replace the bulb within a week of it failing, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated.

Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.

Response required

The Respondent is required to answer. Detach the stub below and scan the code. Your answer is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

Signed, the complainant
Sarah
Witness to service
print name
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file LIG-8299
Marcus
Scan to answer

You are required to respond. Choose one:

No camera? Go to youvebeenserved.shop

VOID00
Also included · the serving script

The words to say while you hand it over.

“Serve it in the room. Bring a flashlight.”

  • The script to read while serving them, in order
  • Stage directions, where to stand, when to pause
  • Best performed to an audience. Film it.

They are probably guilty of something else too

§ 12.1Never replacing the toilet rollReplenishment Order§ 7.6Loading the dishwasher wrongLoading Standards Notice§ 16.5Watching a whole season in one sittingContinuous Viewing Order§ 36.10Buying the loudest possible toyAcoustic Gift Injunction

Also called lightbulb · diy · repairs · lazy