Illumination Discipline Notice

For the one who lights the whole house and then sits in one room of it. Choose 5 charges from 9, or write your own.

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Illumination Discipline Notice · two documents · 5 charges you choose + the serving script
Office of Climate Control
Notice of Warning
In the matter of Illumination of Unoccupied Rooms
File LIG-4040Issued AUGUST 23, 2026Served under youvebeenserved.shop
OffenseEvery light in the house onSeverityStep 1 of 3 · Notice of Warning
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household

You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:

  1. § 4.2a
    Illumination of unoccupied rooms. Leaving lights on in rooms containing nobody.
  2. § 4.2b
    The trail. Establishing a lit path through the house tracing your movements two hours ago.
  3. § 4.2c
    Daylight operation. Running lights through the middle of a bright afternoon.
  4. § 4.2d
    Outdoor extension. Leaving an exterior light on until the following evening.
  5. § 4.2e
    Switch proximity. Passing the switch on your way out and continuing past it.

It is therefore ordered that the Respondent turn a light off when you leave the room it is in, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated. Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.

Response required

The Respondent is required to answer this notice. Detach the stub below and scan it; you may plead guilty, plead not guilty and appeal, or refuse to acknowledge the notice. Your answer is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

Signed, the complainant
Sarah
Witness to service
print name
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file LIG-4040
Marcus

Scan to respond. You may plead guilty, appeal, or refuse to acknowledge this notice. Your response is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

https://www.youvebeenserved.shop
VOID00
Also included · the serving script

The words to say while you hand it over.

“Serve it in the one room they are actually using.”

  • The exact lines to read aloud, in order
  • Stage directions — where to stand, when to pause
  • Best performed to an audience. Film it.

They are probably guilty of something else too

§ 12.1Never replacing the toilet rollReplenishment Order§ 7.6Loading the dishwasher wrongLoading Standards Notice§ 23.3An alarm that wakes everyone but themAlarm Discipline Order§ 12.2Flooding the bathroom floorContainment Order