Unannounced Visit Notice

For the relative who considers the doorbell a form of advance warning. Choose 5 charges from 9, or write your own.

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Unannounced Visit Notice · two documents · 5 charges you choose + the serving script
Office of Hospitality
Notice of Warning
In the matter of Arrival Without Prior Notice
File UNA-8254Issued AUGUST 23, 2026Served under youvebeenserved.shop
In the matter of
Marcus
Respondent · hereinafter “the Occupant”
v.
Upon complaint of
Sarah
Complainant · a member of the household

You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:

  1. § 20.1a
    Arrival without notice. Presenting at a dwelling with no prior communication of any kind.
  2. § 20.1b
    The passing claim. Describing a journey of forty minutes as being in the area anyway.
  3. § 20.1c
    Timing against meals. Selecting the hour at which food is on the table.
  4. § 20.1d
    Duration creep. Converting a brief call into an afternoon without consultation.
  5. § 20.1e
    The unread message. Ignoring a reply declining the visit, sent before you left.

It is therefore ordered that the Respondent send a message and await a reply before setting off, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated. Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.

Response required

The Respondent is required to answer this notice. Detach the stub below and scan it; you may plead guilty, plead not guilty and appeal, or refuse to acknowledge the notice. Your answer is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

OffenseTurning up unannouncedSeverityStep 1 of 3 · Notice of Warning
Signed, the complainant
Sarah
Witness to service
print name
This notice is a gift and carries no legal force whatsoever. It is, however, extremely accurate. Not medical advice — but do get up.
detach and keep
Redemption stub · file UNA-8254
Marcus

Scan to respond. You may plead guilty, appeal, or refuse to acknowledge this notice. Your response is recorded and forwarded to the complainant.

https://www.youvebeenserved.shop
VOID00
Also included · the serving script

The words to say while you hand it over.

“Serve it at the door. Do not invite them in first.”

  • The exact lines to read aloud, in order
  • Stage directions — where to stand, when to pause
  • Best performed to an audience. Film it.

They are probably guilty of something else too

§ 24.3TV at a volume nobody needsBroadcast Volume Order§ 18.1Chewing with your mouth openMastication Conduct Order§ 10.1Never paying back small amountsOutstanding Balance Notice§ 16.4Watching ahead without youSimultaneous Viewing Order