You are hereby notified that the above-named Respondent has been found, upon evidence gathered over a period of considerable patience, to be in breach of the following provisions:
- § 23.1aIllumination of a shared sleeping area. Operating a lit screen within a room occupied by a person actively attempting to sleep.
- § 23.1bFalse declaration of intent. Stating “one more” on eleven separate occasions within a single evening.
- § 23.1cWilful degradation of the following morning. Knowingly incurring a sleep debt that will be repaid, with interest, by everyone in the household.
It is therefore ordered that the Respondent surrender the device to the bedside table no later than eleven (11) o’clock, effective immediately. You are advised that continued conduct of this nature will be escalated.
Compliance will be monitored. There is no appeals process, and there is no one to appeal to.
You are required to respond. Choose one:
No camera? Go to youvebeenserved.shop